Today I Made a Difference

Today I made a difference.( Happened few days ago)
Have you ever had an experience so out of the ordinary that even though you were actually there, you can hardly believe it really happened? That type of experience happened to me today.
My daughter and I went out to eat. At dinner, Varsha commented, “I think you were born to coach/teach people, Mom.” I laughed and told her I agreed. After dinner, we decided to stop in a small department store next door to the restaurant. We split up as we usually do, going in our own direction and meeting up somewhere in the middle.
Today something happened that cemented in stone the direction my life is meant to take. As I was walking down an aisle, a woman spoke to me from behind. It was obvious she was not 100% there mentally, but I was courteous and answered her. She spoke about how bad her job was, and the economy, and how everyone was out to get her, etc…
It was obvious she was a tad bit delusional. I’ve learned to never feel sorry for anyone because we are all special in our own way. I treated her with the same respect and dignity I would any other person and listened to her. That’s all she wanted.
She followed me around as I looked down the aisles, her story getting more in depth as we went along. She mentioned several times how she wished she were dead, and how she would be if it weren’t for taking care of her parents.
I spoke hopeful words to her, and encouraged her to take it a day at a time. I spoke of taking care of herself first so she had more to give to her parents. She was crying when my eleven year old daughter, Varsha, walked up.
Varsha was looking at me with a “what on Earth are you doing, Mom?” look. Her look turned to a look of admiration as she listened to this woman talk with such desperation and heard this lady’s voice and demeanor change as she ate up the attention I was giving her.
I encouraged her to find her dreams and pursue them. She spoke of being a teacher at one time, and I encouraged her to find her place teaching again. I asked her if she liked to write, and she said she loved to. Once again, I encouraged her to start writing and share her experiences with others, as it would be very theraputic.
She had a smile on her face when we parted ways. That was a far cry from the desperation she was wearing a matter of minutes before.
We can all make a difference in this world if we just take the time to share a little bit of ourselves with others. Everyone has a special gift to share with the world, and sometimes it just takes the kindness of a stranger to point it out.
Who knows if she was serious about wanting to kill herself, but if she was, maybe someone showing a little kindness and interest changed her mind. Once again I’m learning life’s lessons in the strangest of ways…
My life was enriched tremendously by this woman, and I realize that my small gesture of kindness will be repaid to me in wonderous ways.
I may never know if I helped her, but she taught me how to be open and a little more selfless and I’m very thankful for her gift.
The next time I’m put in a situation such as this, I’ll do better…I’ll get her name.

On Life and Being Human

Many times in life we realize that we’ve taken a wrong turn, followed the wrong path, so to speak, and before we know it, where somewhere totally different than we had intended to be.

How does this happen? When did we fall astray?

Why were we blind to it when others may have seen it as plain as day?

It’s time to “come clean,” for the lack of better words.

I’ve personally been on a path that has been moving me further and further away from my dream.
How this happened, I’m not quite sure. All I know is that it has happened. The past year has been a roller coaster ride and, at times, I’ve felt as if I was riding unsecured, just hanging on for dear life. I’m sure at times, many (if not all) of you have gone through the same feeling.

How did I allow this into my life? What did I do to attract it?

I found myself asking myself those questions, and in doing so, I found myself realizing that I’ve put too much pressure on myself to have all the answers. I sometimes fall into the trap of questioning myself to death (or just driving myself crazy!)
I fought with myself because I wasn’t too fond of sharing this turmoil with the world, but I found that in exposing myself once again, I may be able to help someone with their issues.
I’ve had turmoil in this past year that has taken it’s toll on me, emotionally as well as physically. It’s amazing, when you are a mentor/coach, people automatically assume you are ALWAYS feeling peachy and have all the answers.
If I got stressed about something, I would hear, “Why don’t you take your own advice” ~

Why on EARTH would anyone assume that because I am coach or a trainer that they would never get down or stressed? Does it take away my ability to be human and feel emotions? Let them walk a day in my shoes and see how hunky dory they feel…

I am not allowed to mention anything about the legal stuff we’re going through (custody-related) but just let me mention this one thing… The legal system is absolutely ridiculous! When it’s over, I’ll share and you’ll understand a bit about what has been going on and why even the “motivational-type” people have their days…

What is the lesson for me? I continue to search. I find myself turning to gratitude because I know that’s the key to putting it all together. I’m grateful for many things in my life. I sometimes forget to look to gratitude because I am human.

I make mistakes.
I sometimes do things the hard way.
And I used to be afraid to admit it.
I suffered from low self-esteem from time to time.
I felt I had to please others to be liked.
And I’ll admit, sometimes those old habits creep back in.
See? I’m very human.

So, we humans have our moments of “realness” and I wanted to share this instead of just being scarce until I worked through it.

Sure, I’ve been busy, but I can’t be inspiring to others without taking care of myself first.

I started working out.
I cut down on chocolates and ice creams
I drink a lot of water.
I got a new hairdo.

I’m just learning to take care of myself a bit more so I have more left to share.
So, that’s the scoop. I hope it makes you realize that it’s okay to have “your moments” as long as you pull yourself right back up and do something about it. I once heard a quote that said that it doesn’t matter how many times you fall down, it’s how many times and how quickly you get up. (That’s paraphrasing about 3 different quotes I read.)
I appreciate you all my friends, my family!

The Tides of Life

At the beach when the tide is going out,
the waves recede and it seems
that nothing is happening in the sea.
But the truth is that the great swells
are gathering strength beneath the waters,
building energy for the time
the tide will return...

It's similar to times in our lives
when something we have depended on
is gone and we are left
with a feeling of emptiness and sadness.

At times like this we can take heart
Knowing that an unseen strength
is building within us.
And if we can only be patient
relying on a sure faith,
the tide of life will turn
and happiness and fulfillment
will once again return to us

Little Bit of Kindness

There are times in our life when we don't take action because we feel the action is too little, that it wouldn't make a difference. However, sometimes the smallest gesture can make a huge impact on someone's life. There are many different ways we can show kindness to others, and it doesn't have to be in a big way.

The simplest of things may make the difference. A smile,a hug,a handshake, a door being held open, a handwritten note, a kind word, the list can go on and on.

I was recently reading some of Aesop's fables and came across the story of "The Lion and The Mouse". While this story has been around for a long time, it still has wisdom in its words. Below is the story:

One day a Lion was asleep when a little Mouse began running up and down his back; this soon wakened the Lion, who placed his huge paw upon him, and opened his big jaws to swallow him.
"Please don't," cried the little Mouse: "forgive me this time, I shall never forget it: who knows but what I may be able to do you a turn some of these days?"
The Lion was so tickled at the idea of the Mouse being able to help him that he lifted up his paw and let him go.
Some time after the Lion was caught in a trap, he pulled with all his might, but the ropes were too strong. Just then the little Mouse happened to pass by, and seeing the sad plight, in which the Lion was, went up to him, and with his sharp little teeth gnawed away the ropes, setting the Lion free.
"You once laughed at me," said the mouse. You thought I was too little to do you a good turn. But see, you owe your life to a poor little mouse."

While you may think the story is far fetched, the point I found in reading the story is not the size of the action that is important, but the difference that a small action made.

keep them close

One day something happened.

And on that clear, evening,in the warmth of her home, the mother of the two was struck with the pain of learning that sometimes there isn't any more.

No more hugs, no more lucky moments to celebrate together,
no more phone calls just to chat, no more "just one minute."
Sometimes, what we care about the most goes away,
never to return before we can say good-bye, say "I Love You."

So while we have it … it's best we love it . And care for it and fix it when it's broken and take good care of it when it's sick.

This is true for marriage … and friendships!
And children with bad report cards;
and aging parents and grandparents.
We keep them because they are worth it,
because we cherish them!

Some things we keep -
like a best friend who moved away
or a classmate we grew up with.
There are just some things that
make us happy, no matter what.
Life is important, and so are the people we know.

And so, keep them close!

visit to a friends place

This write up is thanks to the visit that I had to my friend's place last evening after a long time. The family is so close knit happy go lucky and the moment I rang the bell my friend welcomed me with a smile and a hug and slowly all the members of the family woke up and aunty woke up calling my name and greeting me. Then all of us sat together having conversation and laughing and teasing each other. There was so much of warmth, genuiness such a comforting feeling. It felt so much at home. Never a dull moment at all. It felt defintely there is some bonding and I felt I was a part of their family.

Uncle was at his best with his witty and terrific sense of humor and aunty always smiling and at her best to make me feel special showering with loads of love, wishes and gave me hot steaming pulav, tutty fruity cake and my special chai.. the other member of the house ,friend's sibling was doing his best to prove himself flexible, and macho .. friend of mine silent spectator was enjoying every moment with a smile just not with the lips but also smiling with eyes.They say smile of the eyes is more captivating than the smile of the lips and that was so true. It took a lot of effort on my part to wear my shoes and get away from there and head towards home sweet home.

As I was driving back home, a sense of contentment, calmness engulfed me and tears of joy rolled down my cheeks and I realised sometimes simple pleasures of joy gives you immense satisfaction and happiness that money cant bring and yet most of the time we look for complex things to give us that happiness.

I dedicate this article to that friend of mine and all my other friends who make my life meaningful, fuller and so enriching.. Here it goes...

"The most beautiful thing we can experience is the mysterious. It is the source of all true art and all science. He to whom this emotion is a stranger, who can no longer pause to wonder and stand rapt in awe, is as good as dead: his eyes are closed."

Life is wonderful. We are overcome by feelings of gratitude for the glimpses we occasionally have of its majesty and mystery. And we revel in the opportunity to connect with each other and those of many other walks of life in ways more satisfying than anything we had previously experienced.

I do not know if I will ever have that great relationship with a man. But I'm learning that all relationships are worth working on if they are worth having. I am blessed to have some wonderful friends who have helped me through some pretty rough times.

I am on the road back to me. And I am not afraid.

When we go walking, we do not walk briskly and get exercise. We walk slowly and stop to admire a spider web or a squirrel. Yes, my children slow me down. They make me pay attention, and remind me it is the pauses between the busy notes of life that make the music so beautiful.

There is something about my friends that automatically brings out the silliness in me. It's almost like being reunited with myself, because no thoughts expressed between us are incomprehensible, no jokes ever hang in the air like an albatross. For once, I never have to worry about feeling stupid for making some arbitrary comment. It is the equivalent of pure, creative freedom.

“Words cannot express such joys as a friend imparts.”

Imagine, if you can, a moment in time when you were sitting on a porch swing or a roof top, or beneath the branches of a shady tree. Maybe autumn had laid a crackling carpet of leaves beneath your feet. Or maybe it was a blazing summer day and you were parched for a swig of anything to quench your thirst. Winter may have deposited its first blanket of dew on the ground and you were hunkered down inside your fort, battle-weary and droopy-eyed . Spring may have beckoned you to the garden, and you were down on your knees, toiling in the hot sun, planting seeds to ensure the harvest. Wherever you were, whatever the time of year, nothing else in the world seemed to matter because you were not alone. A friend was at your side. And the moment was perfect.

A friend is a gift. Whether those words have ever rolled off your tongue or drifted through your head in a quiet moment of deep reflection, the truth is undeniable. Friendship is a gift of enormous value. Providing intimacy, rapport, trust, and affection, friendship is the common ground where kindred spirits find communion.

“Words cannot express such joy as a friend imparts,”. “For it would be better for us that the sun were extinguished than we should be without our friends.”

The sunlight of friendship is cast by design. After all, friends don't come included in the “package deal” of our birth or bloodlines. Unlike the families into which we are born, friendships are decided. “Our relatives are ours by chance,” wrote the French poet Jacques Delille, “but we choose our friends.”

The rewards of choosing well can be tremendous. As anyone who has ever had a close friend knows, friends lessen our sorrows and broaden our smiles, allowing us to feel accepted and understood when the world turns its back on us. Like the proverbial “bridge” that spans “troubled waters,” friends lay themselves down and also carry us through the dark nights of the soul. They do this, in the words of William Penn, by “unbosoming freely, advising justly, assisting readily, adventuring boldly, taking all patiently, defending courageously-and continuing a friend unchanged.”

True friends are also the cheerleaders who can provide the wind pushing up beneath our wings, that can lift us out of our doldrums and up to higher ground. When adversaries conspire against us, our friends can be counted on to mount a ready defense. To friends we can entrust our innermost selves, knowing they will safeguard our secrets and advise with gentle candor. Listening to our tribulations, they understand even what we do not say. Loyal, dependable, and kind, friends go out on a limb where the sweetest delights are found.